Plans.. non materialize yet

As the neighbors' dogs outside barking, my mind create its on imagination... how romantic it would be if its the sounds of wolf howling at the full moon. or the sounds of owls trying to tell you that they're on watch. I have nothing worth to read at on my blog.. yet I am here writing every single thoughts in my head. Its already January 14, 2008. I was here..when? well, its probably over 2 months by now. Nothing significant changes yet. I don't feels like I've been away from my "home" as I am surrounded with my nephews and nieces.

I've been spending my days teaching my sister-in-law driving, being their personal driver when they need to go to places that they need to go is too "challenging" for her to drive, and spend ours in CoffeeBean while waitng for them to be done, Spending my every waken moment watching every single movie on the astro (when I'm not out driving)... playing this meaningless (yet fun) Human pet on the Facebook... where I to go from here?

Am I being ungrateful for having such easy life? or its right for me to feels that... he is holding me up here. No...I refuse to think that! I such a selfish brother wanting things to go the way I wanted. Yet.. he's not entirely to be blame... I didn't communicate of what I want. But than... when I said something... he always have something for me not to think otherwise. Ahh... I have no understanding of these rambling myself.. just being frustrated and bored I guess.

Well, as he planned it. I will be joining him on the 25 along with my brother in law, who is on his break here. And before I can follow him... I need my working visa. And I need to take it in Singapore! Why? I do not know know. So, since I am going to Indonesia on the 25, I planned to be in Kuala Lumpur earlier. Or even to catch my friends Ivy & CK's weeding.

whats with these neighbors dog? they are still barking!! and it is already 1am!!

Ok. Back to that thing... I am yet to do a couple of things to get my documents in order. So, I know that issue is holding up me right here. Why didn't I do it earlier? hahaha... you know me. I am a big procrastinator! So.. thats probably answer the question. And you know... Watching the drama on TV is very busy things to do... those tons of tv drama out there... somebody got to do the job to watch them all you know.. hahahahaha

So.. thats the plan in January* so far... if its happens, praise the Lord!... if not.. maybe he'll asked me to wait for him again to return next month? will see... I already upset my sister so much for not being there, for forgetting to call on important dates stuff like that. I am not feeling very good being ME at this particular moment. That why this post sounds more er.. dont know the word. who cares! Every1 hates me.. why I don't I just hate myself for this seconds.

ok. done with hating,...

Dont worry.. I would love myself back... by going to bed now..

I can't wait for Brothers & Sisters S02 E10 comes out!! (its my uttorent/limewire language)

Good Night!